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Monday, January 3, 2011

Change of heart....

I had a moment, today...a moment that I realized, very clearly, what a difficult job it is to deal with me and my ideas. I don't think we are, usually, in a position to see that about ourselves. We go on...day to day...not really seeing that we can be a handful. We spend so much time thinking about how difficult those around us can be...but never really see it in ourselves. Let me explain....one week ago...just one short week...I was HATING the idea of removing Christmas. I was applauding those individuals who were defying the popular way of thinking, and were still celebrating the Holidays. The Hallmark channel continued to play Christmas movies right through yesterday, there were still commercials (yes, I know they are annoying...) with Christmas scenes, the decorations were still up at the malls...and to all of this I was saying "good for you!!!"...I was turning the tree lights on at home, thinking about how beautiful it was and, secretly, wishing this could go on for a while longer. All of those lights make the house so warm and cozy...I just didn't want to put it away. Now here we are, just one short week later...and I want it ALL AWAY!!! When does that happen?? What is that magic moment when your inner self is secure with the thought of change? More importantly...how can you go from one extreme to the other SO quickly??? It came over me SO thoroughly that we HAD to go to the shop and get some organization TODAY....on our day off!!! I just wanted to get a little bit done...just make it a little bit better...we were there a little over 6 hours. We moved furniture, cleaned, changed lights (that had burned out...) moved merchandise, made room for the stuff I am expecting tomorrow (I hope...) and my husband never said a word. Just did what ever I asked of him. I have a vision...always...and it has gotten to the point where he figures it is better to join than fight...and when it is all said and done, he is glad that we got so much done, too. Of course...we still have to pack up our things here at home, but getting started is half the battle!! I am glad to have some serenity back...and even "gladder" to have a family that tolerates my "thoughts and ideas"....Oh...if we move that over there and put these in here then we could do that on top of this and.....

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